Now some people might think that I’m a little bit extreme about this drink, but in my
Number one, Mountain Dew original; the familiar green glow that is put out by this particular flavor is synonymous with only one thing, pure, concentrate, awesome. It is very hard to describe the flavor of this drink, I guess you can picture the wealth of an entire country converted into a flavor, then crammed into a 12oz can that tingles when you drink it.
Number two, Mountain Dew Code Red; I don’t know why they named it code red (maybe because of the red alarm you kidneys send out when you drink it) all Mtn. Dew CR (code red) is, is the original flavoring of Mtn. Dew with a huge black of cherry extract. The result of said flavoring is something that is akin to going hang gliding, or parasailing in the rough ocean waves of a tsunami.
Number three, Mountain Dew Baja Blast; as a Taco Bell ( I’m sure I’ll post my experiences at Taco Bell another day, because I have lots of them) exclusive, MDBB is an odd variety of Mtn. Dew and a complete piece of crap. It contains within it the flavor of ocean spray, mixed with the flavor of dead cat, and the aftertaste of bugs in your teeth as if you are racing in the sand aboard your favorite dune buggy.
Recently the Pepsi Company responsible for the creation of Mtn. Dew has released three new flavors, and they are named respectively Mtn. Dew Voltage, Supernova, and Revolution as a part of a new promotion, where the best liked flavor will be an addition to the previous line of Mtn. Dew products. As of right now while I am writing this, I am reviewing these three flavors (and in the process creating the world’s first Leaning Tower of Pisa out of empty cans next to my computer chair). When the results are in for the winner the promotion, I will gladly post my thoughts of the “new Dew”. As for what Mtn. Dew has done for me, it has made me almost pass out on multiple occasions (including a church service). It is also the sole responsibility for my friends and I winning a “mock” court case in which we were the prosecutors in a case which we knew the defendant was innocent, well the outcome of staying up all night drinking Mtn. Dew and plotting how to buy off, blackmail, or otherwise convince the jury of our case was a complete success as we took the case by storm (the defense never saw what hit them).
So as I wrap up my little speech about the “Dew” I can finally turn off Handel’s concerto number 6 in g minor, and turn back on my death metal so I can finally relax and get some actually work done (and by work I mean playing counter-strike until 1am or finally figuring out how to crack my neighbors WPA2 key on his wireless network). As a final farewell, I wish to ask my readers one question, and that question is “do you know any single hot women between the ages of 18-23?” if your answer is yes; then please e-mail me. Thanks a lot for reading.
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